20200417
ERASING
GUILT MEMORIES
17 April, 2020, Easter Friday
Readings at Mass
Liturgical
Colour: White.
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First reading
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Acts 4:1-12 ©
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The name of Jesus Christ is the only one by which we can be saved
While Peter and
John were talking to the people the priests came up to them, accompanied by the
captain of the Temple and the Sadducees. They were extremely annoyed at their
teaching the people the doctrine of the resurrection from the dead by
proclaiming the resurrection of Jesus. They arrested them, but as it was
already late, they held them till the next day. But many of those who had
listened to their message became believers, the total number of whom had now
risen to something like five thousand.
The
next day the rulers, elders and scribes had a meeting in Jerusalem with Annas
the high priest, Caiaphas, Jonathan, Alexander and all the members of the
high-priestly families. They made the prisoners stand in the middle and began
to interrogate them, ‘By what power, and by whose name have you men done this?’
Then Peter, filled with the Holy Spirit, addressed them, ‘Rulers of the people,
and elders! If you are questioning us today about an act of kindness to a
cripple, and asking us how he was healed, then I am glad to tell you all, and
would indeed be glad to tell the whole people of Israel, that it was by the
name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, the one you crucified, whom God raised from
the dead, by this name and by no other that this man is able to stand up
perfectly healthy, here in your presence, today. This is the stone rejected by
you the builders, but which has proved to be the keystone. For of all the names
in the world given to men, this is the only one by which we can be saved.’
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Responsorial
Psalm
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Psalm 117(118):1-2,4,22-27 ©
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The
stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone.
or
Alleluia,
alleluia, alleluia!
Give
thanks to the Lord for he is good,
for
his love has no end.
Let
the sons of Israel say:
‘His
love has no end.’
Let
those who fear the Lord say:
‘His
love has no end.’
The
stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone.
or
Alleluia,
alleluia, alleluia!
The
stone which the builders rejected
has
become the corner stone.
This
is the work of the Lord,
a
marvel in our eyes.
This
day was made by the Lord;
we
rejoice and are glad.
The
stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone.
or
Alleluia,
alleluia, alleluia!
O
Lord, grant us salvation;
O
Lord, grant success.
Blessed
in the name of the Lord
is
he who comes.
We
bless you from the house of the Lord;
the
Lord God is our light.
The
stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone.
or
Alleluia,
alleluia, alleluia!
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Sequence
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Victimae Paschali Laudes
Christians,
to the Paschal Victim
offer
sacrifice and praise.
The
sheep are ransomed by the Lamb;
and
Christ, the undefiled,
hath
sinners to his Father reconciled.
Death
with life contended:
combat
strangely ended!
Life’s
own Champion, slain,
yet
lives to reign.
Tell
us, Mary:
say
what thou didst see
upon
the way.
The
tomb the Living did enclose;
I saw
Christ’s glory as he rose!
The
angels there attesting;
shroud
with grave-clothes resting.
Christ,
my hope, has risen:
he
goes before you into Galilee.
That
Christ is truly risen
from
the dead we know.
Victorious
king, thy mercy show!
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Gospel
Acclamation
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Ps117:24
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Alleluia,
alleluia!
This
day was made by the Lord:
we
rejoice and are glad.
Alleluia!
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Gospel
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John 21:1-14 ©
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Jesus stepped forward, took the bread and gave it to them, and the
same with the fish
Jesus showed
himself again to the disciples. It was by the Sea of Tiberias, and it happened
like this: Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathanael from Cana in Galilee,
the sons of Zebedee and two more of his disciples were together. Simon Peter
said, ‘I’m going fishing.’ They replied, ‘We’ll come with you.’ They went out
and got into the boat but caught nothing that night.
It
was light by now and there stood Jesus on the shore, though the disciples did
not realise that it was Jesus. Jesus called out, ‘Have you caught anything,
friends?’ And when they answered, ‘No’, he said, ‘Throw the net out to
starboard and you’ll find something.’ So they dropped the net, and there were
so many fish that they could not haul it in. The disciple Jesus loved said to
Peter, ‘It is the Lord.’ At these words ‘It is the Lord’, Simon Peter, who had
practically nothing on, wrapped his cloak round him and jumped into the water.
The other disciples came on in the boat, towing the net and the fish; they were
only about a hundred yards from land.
As
soon as they came ashore they saw that there was some bread there, and a
charcoal fire with fish cooking on it. Jesus said, ‘Bring some of the fish you
have just caught.’ Simon Peter went aboard and dragged the net to the shore,
full of big fish, one hundred and fifty-three of them; and in spite of there
being so many the net was not broken. Jesus said to them, ‘Come and have
breakfast.’ None of the disciples was bold enough to ask, ‘Who are you?’; they
knew quite well it was the Lord. Jesus then stepped forward, took the bread and
gave it to them, and the same with the fish. This was the third time that Jesus
showed himself to the disciples after rising from the dead.
ERASING GUILT
MEMORIES
SCRIPTURE READINGS: [ACTS 4:1-12; PS 118:1-2, 4, 22-27; JOHN
21:1-14 ]
Many of us cannot
forgive our own past mistakes; neither can we forgive that of others. We continue to live in guilt and
pain. We are unable to let go of the negative events in our lives.
Instead of dealing with them, we suppress our pains and drown them with other
activities so that we are distracted from facing our past. Yet, deep in
our hearts, the hurts and resentment in us are festering each day.
Imprisoned by our past, we are not free to move forward in life. We
continue to dwell in our pains, in our shame and in our anger.
This was the case of St
Peter who could not forgive himself for betraying the Lord. He was the one who so
confidently said to the Lord, “Even though I must die with you, I will not deny
you.” (Mt
26:35) Yet when he was put to the test, he denied the Lord. Before
the charcoal fire, when asked by a slavewhether he was one of the disciples of
the Lord, “he began to curse, and he swore an oath, ‘I do not know the
man!'” (Mt 26:74) When the cock crowed, “Peter remembered
what Jesus had said: ‘Before the cock crows, you will deny me three times.’ And
he went out and wept bitterly.” (Mt 26:75)
He could never forget this incident and he was so ashamed of his betrayal.
This explains why on
Sunday morning when the women reported to Peter and John that the tomb was
empty, both ran to the empty tomb. Simon Peter “saw the linen wrappings lying
there, and the cloth that had been on Jesus’ head, not lying with the
linen wrappings but rolled up in a place by itself. Then the other
disciple, who reached the tomb first, also went in, and he saw and believed.” (Jn 20:7f)
Of Peter, nothing was mentioned whether he believed that the Lord was risen,
except for John. More likely, he was astounded and amazed but thoughts
would have lingered over his mind that it was too good to be true, that his
master was alive. He could not believe that the Lord was risen because of
his guilt of betrayal.
In today’s gospel, Peter decided to take time out to
drown his sorrows and guilt by doing what he always liked to do and what he was
good at, namely, fishing, to boost his deflated ego. “Simon Peter
said, ‘I’m going fishing.’ They replied, ‘We’ll come with you.'” Peter
had gone back to Galilee after the passion and death of our Lord. With
the death of their master, he thought that everything was lost and everything
was over. Although the Lord had risen and appeared to them on two
occasions previously and extended His peace to them, Peter was not able to
accept the forgiveness of our Lord. He was not sure that the Lord had
truly forgiven him. His shame and guilt continued to haunt him.
If we feel this way, the
gospel tells us that the light is dawning because the Risen Lord is with
us. The gospel says, “It was light by now and there stood Jesus on the shore.” Indeed, the Lord today wants to free us
for love and joy in life, by freeing us from our past. Although they
caught nothing and when they thought they were failures, Jesus was with them
again. When the Lord is present, there is no darkness. “Jesus
called out, ‘Have you caught anything, friends?’ And when they answered, ‘No’,
he said, ‘Throw the net out to starboard and you’ll find something.’ So they
dropped the net, and there were so many fish that they could not haul it
in.” It is so beautiful to know that the Lord had come to lighten up the
lives of the disciples, especially Peter who was still living in guilt.
He repeated the miraculous catch of fish for the sake of Peter and the rest of
the disciples. They would have remembered the miraculous catch earlier on when
Peter “fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, ‘Go away from me, Lord, for I am a
sinful man!'” (Lk 5:8) The Lord wanted to bring Peter back to that
same scene so that he will know that the One who forgave him when He was on
earth is the same One now risen, forgiving him again. And the job He gave
him to be fishers of men had still not been withdrawn. He had not been
sacked but reaffirmed in his vocation.
When we are not able to
forgive ourselves, we cannot see our brothers and sisters in perspective, especially when we have sinned
against them or when they have sinned against us. Our guilt and fear
prevent us from recognizing them, just as Peter could not recognize the Lord
even though it was already light by then. This was not the case for
St John. He was the beloved disciple of the Lord. Although he ran
away, he came back quickly to support Mary at the foot of the cross.
Hence, he could believe in His resurrection when he saw the tomb empty. Again,
today, he was the one who pointed out to Peter and the others, “It is the
Lord!” Only love can remove every obstacle in union and
relationship. Love can see what reason cannot.
Nevertheless, deep in
his heart, Peter really loved the Lord even though he was weak. Jesus knew the heart of
Peter. Weighed down by his guilt, he could not recognize the Lord.
However, when John pointed out to him, “It is the Lord”, “Simon Peter, who had
practically nothing on, wrapped his cloak round him and jumped into the
water.” Indeed, Peter loved the Lord so much that he ran towards the
Lord. And upon reaching the shore, “they saw that there was some bread
there, and a charcoal fire with fish cooking on it.” Peter heard the Lord
once again, inviting them for a meal. “Bring some of the fish you have
just caught.” To show that the Risen Lord is in continuity with the Jesus
of Nazareth, “Jesus then stepped forward, took the bread and gave it to them,
and the same with the fish.”
Such was the patient and
tender love and mercy of our Lord in reaching out to Peter. He did not hurry him to find healing
instantly. He gave him time to dispose himself for forgiveness by helping
him to go back to those negative events that haunted him. The Lord
brought him to that time when he experienced His mercy when he was proud and
arrogant. Now the Lord brought him back to the charcoal fire when he
denied Him three times before the servants. Healing and self-acceptance
often take time. Few are healed instantly except with the special grace
of God. Forgiveness takes time, whether we are the one extending
forgiveness or the one receiving forgiveness. For most of us, we
need time to process, to go through our past events, relive them and understand
them in a new light so that we could reconcile our past with the present.
That was what the Lord did for Peter and the apostles.
He helped Peter to
rewrite his history by over-writing his past mistakes with God’s mercy and
goodness. Soon, He would allow
Peter to write over his three-fold denial with a three-fold love for Him.
Then He would invite Peter to follow Him to the cross. Before that, he
was not yet ready to die for the love of the Lord. Now, the Lord knew he
was ready and therefore could say to him, “Very truly, I tell you, when you
were younger, you used to fasten your own belt and to go wherever you wished.
But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will
fasten a belt around you and take you where you do not wish to go.” (He said
this to indicate the kind of death by which he would glorify God.) After this
he said to him, “Follow me.” (Jn 21:18f)
How do we know that we
are healed completely? When
we are able to announce to others that Jesus is the Christ, our savior and
healer. After being healed of his past and forgiven, Peter recalled
his first calling to be “fishers of men.” Peter and the apostles left
their trade to join Jesus to be fishers of men. But in their guilt and
shame, they abandoned their call and went back to fishing. Now having
been healed by the Lord, we read in the first reading how they were now ready
to testify to Him without fear and at the risk of their lives. Before the
Sanhedrin and religious leaders, they were not afraid to accuse them of killing
Jesus and that Jesus is their Savior. When asked, “By what power, and by
whose name have you men done this?”, filled with the Holy Spirit, their reply
was, “I am glad to tell you all, and would indeed be glad to tell the whole
people of Israel, that it was by the name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, the one
you crucified, whom God raised from the dead, by this name and by no other that
this man is able to stand up perfectly healthy, here in your presence today.
This is the stone rejected by you the builders, but which has proved to be the
keystone. For all the names in the world given to men, this is the only one by
which we can be saved.” When we are freed from our pains and oppressions,
we are at the same time, set free to serve Christ.
Written
by The Most Rev William Goh, Roman Catholic Archbishop of Singapore © All
Rights Reserved
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