20211226 THE ROLE OF PARENTS IN FORMING CHILDREN OF GOD
26 December, 2021, Sunday, The Holy Family
First reading |
1 Samuel 1:20-22,24-28 © |
This is the child I prayed for: he is made over to the Lord.
Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son, and called him Samuel ‘since’ she said ‘I asked the Lord for him.’
When a year had gone by, the husband Elkanah went up again with all his family to offer the annual sacrifice to the Lord and to fulfil his vow. Hannah, however, did not go up, having said to her husband, ‘Not before the child is weaned. Then I will bring him and present him before the Lord and he shall stay there for ever.’
When she had weaned him, she took him up with her together with a three-year-old bull, an ephah of flour and a skin of wine, and she brought him to the temple of the Lord at Shiloh; and the child was with them. They slaughtered the bull and the child’s mother came to Eli. She said, ‘If you please, my lord. As you live, my lord, I am the woman who stood here beside you, praying to the Lord. This is the child I prayed for, and the Lord granted me what I asked him. Now I make him over to the Lord for the whole of his life. He is made over to the Lord.’
Responsorial Psalm |
Psalm 83(84):2-3,5-6,9-10 © |
They are happy who dwell in your house, O Lord.
How lovely is your dwelling place,
Lord, God of hosts.
My soul is longing and yearning,
is yearning for the courts of the Lord.
My heart and my soul ring out their joy
to God, the living God.
They are happy who dwell in your house, O Lord.
They are happy, who dwell in your house,
for ever singing your praise.
They are happy, whose strength is in you,
in whose hearts are the roads to Zion.
They are happy who dwell in your house, O Lord.
O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer,
give ear, O God of Jacob.
Turn your eyes, O God, our shield,
look on the face of your anointed.
They are happy who dwell in your house, O Lord.
Second reading |
1 John 3:1-2,21-24 © |
We are called God's children, and that is what we are
Think of the love that the Father has lavished on us,
by letting us be called God’s children;
and that is what we are.
Because the world refused to acknowledge him,
therefore it does not acknowledge us.
My dear people, we are already the children of God
but what we are to be in the future has not yet been revealed;
all we know is, that when it is revealed
we shall be like him
because we shall see him as he really is.
My dear people,
if we cannot be condemned by our own conscience,
we need not be afraid in God’s presence,
and whatever we ask him,
we shall receive,
because we keep his commandments
and live the kind of life that he wants.
His commandments are these:
that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ
and that we love one another
as he told us to.
Whoever keeps his commandments
lives in God and God lives in him.
We know that he lives in us
by the Spirit that he has given us.
Gospel Acclamation | cf.Ac16:14 |
Alleluia, alleluia!
Open our heart, O Lord,
to accept the words of your Son.
Alleluia!
Gospel | Luke 2:41-52 © |
Mary stored up all these things in her heart
Every year the parents of Jesus used to go to Jerusalem for the feast of the Passover. When he was twelve years old, they went up for the feast as usual. When they were on their way home after the feast, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem without his parents knowing it. They assumed he was with the caravan, and it was only after a day’s journey that they went to look for him among their relations and acquaintances. When they failed to find him they went back to Jerusalem looking for him everywhere.
Three days later, they found him in the Temple, sitting among the doctors, listening to them, and asking them questions; and all those who heard him were astounded at his intelligence and his replies. They were overcome when they saw him, and his mother said to him, ‘My child, why have, you done this to us? See how worried your father and I have been, looking for you.’
‘Why were you looking for me?’ he replied. ‘Did you not know that I must be busy with my Father’s affairs?’ But they did not understand what he meant.
He then went down with them and came to Nazareth and lived under their authority.
His mother stored up all these things in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom, in stature, and in favour with God and men.
THE ROLE OF PARENTS IN FORMING CHILDREN OF GOD
SCRIPTURE READINGS: [1 Sm 1:20-22.24-28; Ps 84; 1 Jn 3:1-2.21-24; Lk 2:41-52]
Today we celebrate the Feast of the Holy Family. This comes immediately after Christmas because with Jesus, Mary and Joseph, we can speak of a family. Indeed, to be a family, we need to have children, otherwise, the life of the married couple would not be complete. This is why procreation is a natural outcome of marriage. After creating men and women, the Lord said, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over every living thing that moves upon the earth.” (Gn 1:28) This is why the Church teaches that marriage is not just for companionship but it must be fruitful, be open to new life.
However, it is not just a question of bringing children into the world. Children must not be seen as investments for the parents’ old age or even for the economy of the country. Quite often, we tend to see children from the perspective of use and benefits. This might be true especially of the older generation and our forefathers because they were needed to work in the farm, to take care of them in their old age and to continue the family name. It was a question of rendering support and protection for each other. However, today, the world has changed. Children no longer are seen as assets for the married couple. In fact, they are seen as a great financial liability. At any rate, parents no longer need the support of their children because they have more than sufficient savings of their own to see them through till death. On the contrary, many of the grown-up children still depend on their parent’s financial help even when they are already working or have children of their own.
Having children should never be seen in a utilitarian manner. They are not a commodity to be spent or some property that we own. On the contrary, children must be seen as a gift from God. They are precious gifts from God so that we can share in His love, a love that is fruitful. True love is never kept within a couple. When that happens, that couple will be stifled, become possessive and insecure. True love needs to be expanded and go beyond the couple. The love between the couple when developed will make them want to share their love with others and particularly more so if that person is the fruit of their love. When we love and allow ourselves to be loved in return, love becomes reciprocal and empowering. Such love grows from strength to strength and eventually extends to the community and society. So children are for love and relationship primarily. But children are not just meant for us. They belong to God and to the community.
Indeed, the children that we have do not belong to us but to God. This is the recurring theme of today’s scripture readings. In the first reading, Hannah was clear that Samuel was a gift from God. He was called by God. God did not give Samuel to her for herself but for the community. Hence, after weaning the child, she brought him to the Temple. She told Eli, “If you please, my lord. As you live, my lord, I am the woman who stood here beside you, praying to the Lord. This is the child I prayed for, and the Lord granted me what I asked him. Now I make him over to the Lord for the whole of his life. He is made over to the Lord.”
What is beyond our capacity to do, she did. In a terse manner, the bible said, “There she left him, for the Lord.” How many parents are willing to sacrifice their children for the good of society or the Church? How many parents prevent their children from joining the priesthood and religious life, or give themselves for the mission simply because they want to own them or use them for themselves and their security? Some of us are not generous enough to let them go to fulfil their vocation and calling in life. Instead of helping them to find their potentials and grow to become the child that God meant for them, we hinder their growth.
Hence, we must never forget that they are God’s children, like Jesus, who was entrusted to the care of Joseph and Mary. St John reiterates, “Think of the love that the Father has lavished on us, by letting us be called God’s children; and that is what we are. Because the world refused to acknowledge him, therefore it does not acknowledge us. My dear people, we are already the children of God but what we are to be in the future has not yet been revealed; all we know is, that when it is revealed we shall be like him because we shall see him as he really is.” Indeed, we are all children of God even if many do not recognize Him as such. Only when we know Him, can we find intimacy.
Our responsibility as parents is to ensure that they discover their real identity as God’s children and so be able to live out their lives in such a way that they reflect God’s love, mercy and compassion in their lives. St John wrote, “His commandments are these: that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and that we love one another as he told us to. Whoever keeps his commandments lives in God and God lives in him. We know that he lives in us by the Spirit that he has given us.” There is only one vocation in life which is to love, beginning from the family and then extended to the community. We are all called to love.
That was the way Mary and Joseph raised up our Lord. In today’s gospel, we see how they taught Jesus by their example as faithful Jews, going to Jerusalem for the feast of the Passover as commanded by Moses. They brought Jesus with them. They knew that their responsibility as parents first and foremost was to bring their child up to be God-fearing and filial to Him. We see how well they brought up Jesus because when they found Him three days later, He was at the Temple, “sitting among the doctors, listening to them, and asking them questions; and all those who heard him were astounded at his intelligence and his replies.” What confirms that Mary and Joseph had truly lived out their responsibility as parents was when they asked Him, “My child, why have you done this to us? See how worried your father and I have been, looking for you.’ ‘Why were you looking for me?” The reply of Jesus was clear. “Did you not know that I must be busy with my Father’s affairs?” Already at that tender age, our Lord was clear that His primary relationship must be with His Father. He should be busy with the affairs of His heavenly Father.
Does it mean therefore that when we offer our children back to God, we lose them? On the contrary, we have them forever because they will love us even more. That is the consequence of having piety for the Lord. After telling His parents where the priority of His relationship lay we read, “He then went down with them and came to Nazareth and lived under their authority. His mother stored up all these things in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom, in stature, and in favour with God and men.” This is something we can learn from them. Some parents think that if they give more love to their children, help them to be successful in life, study hard, have a good career, make plenty of money, they will be happy and they will be with them until they die. On the contrary, children without love for God will not be so filial to their parents. Some of them might even be driven by worldly success, live for themselves, are individualistic and eventually leave their parents to be on their own. And to be independent from them, some eventually migrate overseas after earning their degrees and getting a good job.
So today, as we celebrate the Feast of the Holy Family, let us cherish our children as gifts from God for us to form them in love through the loving example of the parents. We are called to form them according to God’s commandments so that we have a clear conscience before God, knowing that we have done our best as parents. St John wrote, “My dear people, if we cannot be condemned by our own conscience, we need not be afraid in God’s presence, and whatever we ask him, we shall receive, because we keep his commandments and live the kind of life that he wants.” Offering our children back to God and to the community is what will help them to find their identity, mission and purpose in life. The more they give themselves to God and to the community, the more they find life a great joy, meaningful and most of all, fruitful. Together with them, we can then celebrate love and life.
Written by The Most Rev William Goh, Roman Catholic Archbishop of Singapore © All Rights Reserved.
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