20220613 MISPLACED LOVE AND LOYALTY
13 June, 2022, Monday, 11th Week in Ordinary Time
First reading | 1 Kings 21:1-16 © |
Ahab covets Naboth's vineyard and Jezebel has him killed
Naboth of Jezreel had a vineyard close by the palace of Ahab king of Samaria, and Ahab said to Naboth, ‘Give me your vineyard to be my vegetable garden, since it adjoins my house; I will give you a better vineyard for it or, if you prefer, I will give you its worth in money.’ But Naboth answered Ahab, ‘The Lord forbid that I should give you the inheritance of my ancestors!’
Ahab went home gloomy and out of temper at the words of Naboth of Jezreel, ‘I will not give you the inheritance of my fathers.’ He lay down on his bed and turned his face away and refused to eat. His wife Jezebel came to him. ‘Why are you so dispirited’ she said ‘that you will not eat?’ He said, ‘I have been speaking to Naboth of Jezreel; I said: “Give me your vineyard either for money or, if you prefer, for another vineyard in exchange.” But he said, “I will not give you my vineyard.”’ Then his wife Jezebel said, ‘You make a fine king of Israel, and no mistake! Get up and eat; cheer up, and you will feel better; I will get you the vineyard of Naboth of Jezreel myself.’
So she wrote letters in Ahab’s name and sealed them with his seal, sending them to the elders and nobles who lived where Naboth lived. In the letters she wrote, ‘Proclaim a fast, and put Naboth in the forefront of the people. Confront him with a couple of scoundrels who will accuse him like this, “You have cursed God and the king.” Then take him outside and stone him to death.’
The men of Naboth’s town, the elders and nobles who lived in his town, did what Jezebel ordered, what was written in the letters she had sent them. They proclaimed a fast and put Naboth in the forefront of the people. Then the two scoundrels came and stood in front of him and made their accusation, ‘Naboth has cursed God and the king.’ They led him outside the town and stoned him to death. They then sent word to Jezebel, ‘Naboth has been stoned to death.’ When Jezebel heard that Naboth had been stoned to death, she said to Ahab, ‘Get up! Take possession of the vineyard which Naboth of Jezreel would not give you for money, for Naboth is no longer alive, he is dead.’ When Ahab heard that Naboth was dead, he got up to go down to the vineyard of Naboth of Jezreel and take possession of it.
Responsorial Psalm | Psalm 5:2-3,5-7 © |
Give heed to my groaning, O Lord.
To my words give ear, O Lord,
give heed to my groaning.
Attend to the sound of my cries,
my King and my God.
Give heed to my groaning, O Lord.
You are no God who loves evil;
no sinner is your guest.
The boastful shall not stand their ground
before your face.
Give heed to my groaning, O Lord.
You hate all who do evil;
you destroy all who lie.
The deceitful and bloodthirsty man
the Lord detests.
Give heed to my groaning, O Lord.
Gospel Acclamation | Jn14:23 |
Alleluia, alleluia!
If anyone loves me he will keep my word,
and my Father will love him,
and we shall come to him.
Alleluia!
Or: | Ps118:105 |
Alleluia, alleluia!
Your word is a lamp for my steps
and a light for my path.
Alleluia!
Gospel | Matthew 5:38-42 © |
Offer the wicked man no resistance
Jesus said to his disciples: ‘You have learnt how it was said: Eye for eye and tooth for tooth. But I say this to you: offer the wicked man no resistance. On the contrary, if anyone hits you on the right cheek, offer him the other as well; if a man takes you to law and would have your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone orders you to go one mile, go two miles with him. Give to anyone who asks, and if anyone wants to borrow, do not turn away.’
MISPLACED LOVE AND LOYALTY
SCRIPTURE READINGS: [1 Kgs 21:1-16; Mt 5:38-42 ]
In the first reading, we read about Queen Jezebel. She is known as the wickedest lady in the Old Testament, together with her husband King Ahab. Leaving aside moral judgement on her actions, we must commend her for her total loyalty, commitment and love for her husband. She would do anything to please her husband and to make him happy. In today’s incident when Naboth refused to give Ahab his vineyard at any price, the king, like a pampered and spoilt child, wallowed in self-pity, anger and then fell into depression. His wife, seeing his condition and feeling sorry for him, said, “Get up and eat; cheer up, and you will feel better; I will get you the vineyard of Naboth of Jezreel myself.” She must have been very devoted to the King and loved him much, so much so that she could not afford to see him suffering or sad.
This is true for many of us, whether as spouses or parents and even friends. When we love someone, we want to make our beloved happy. When we see them sad, suffering or hurting, we too are hurt and feel worried for them. Indeed, when our loved one is sick or suffering from a prolonged illness or incurable sickness; or when our children are doing poorly in their studies or suffering a failed relationship; or when our spouse is out of work or facing challenges at the work place, we feel much for them and wish we could alleviate their suffering and pain. For those whom we love, there is no sacrifice too big that we cannot make. Their joy and happiness are ours. Conversely, their sadness and discouragement are ours as well. This is because we are so identified with them and for them.
Yet, like Queen Jezebel, quite often our love is misplaced and so is our loyalty. Whilst we should do everything in our power to help our loved ones, we must not destroy them in the process. We are to help them to become better, not worse! Our task is not just to help them get what they want but to help them to grow in grace, maturity, wisdom, knowledge and love. Although the Queen demonstrated herself to be faithful to her husband and would do anything for him, even planning to take the vineyard by force through murder, this was not the right thing to do. By so doing, she caused her husband to sin with her and inflict injustice on Naboth and ultimately bring harm to the family and the nation. In truth, she was not helping her husband, but by pandering to his whims and fancies, she brought about his and her destruction.
Therefore, when we are helping our loved ones, we must do the good and the right thing, and not just because they need it or want it. Doing the homework for our children is not helping them to learn and acquire knowledge. Doing the work of our colleagues when it is their responsibility is not helping them to be efficient and competent. Giving in to the demands and wants of our children and spouse can cause them to be lazy, materialistic and self-centred. So, whilst it is important that we should love them and help them, we must do it in a way that is for their good, not just now, but the future. Our task is to help them grow in love, generosity, kindness and responsibility. We do not help them to do evil things like Queen Jezebel, or help them to do immoral things like stealing, cheating, getting drunk, getting involved in orgies and debauchery. Rather, we must help them to be virtuous, by reflecting with them their wants and needs; accompanying them patiently in their growth and allowing them to mature in grace and wisdom. This is the kind of help and love we should demonstrate, rather than spoiling them and eventually making them lazy, selfish and irresponsible. If we love them this way, we do not love them in truth but ourselves more, because we cannot bear to see them being purified in love.
However, the gospel seems to contradict what we have just been saying. The Lord tells us to give in to our enemies and not to take revenge. He even suggested that we do more than seek mere natural justice. He said, “You have learnt how it was said: Eye for eye and tooth for tooth. But I say this to you: offer the wicked man no resistance.” This principle in itself is not wrong but inadequate. When this law was taught it was intended to be a guide to help those who administer justice. The principle of an eye for an eye simply means that the punishment must fit the crime. We should not punish a person more than the offence he has committed. Thus, this principle offers a good guide in tampering justice with leniency. In this way, we do not become over lenient or too harsh in imposing punishment on those who break the law.
But this principle cannot be applied literally, for it is only a guide. In truth, an eye for an eye does not work because it is not truly fair. Both eyes and teeth are different in each person. Maybe one is losing his eyesight and the other still has a good eye. We remember the ludicrous example given by William Shakespeare in the play, “Merchant of Venice” where the man tried to exact a pound of flesh from one who could not pay his debt. But the real problem was that if he were to cut a little bit more, then he would have caused a grave act of injustice as well. The point is simply that in life, things are never that clear cut.
What is paramount for Jesus is that justice should be done by making the situation better, not worse like Queen Jezebel. So, Jesus is urging non-resistance towards our enemies because it will only make matters worse. By taking revenge against each other, we will hurt not just our enemies but ourselves and the whole community. Some of us are just bent on taking revenge. We have no intention of healing the situation or remedying a fault, but our real intention is to make sure our enemies or those who have offended us suffer. This is not justice.
To improve the situation, what we need to do is to make our enemies our friends. This is what Jesus meant when He said, “On the contrary, if anyone hits you on the right cheek, offer him the other as well; if a man takes you to law and would have your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone orders you to go one mile, go two miles with him. Give to anyone who asks, and if anyone wants to borrow, do not turn away.” By loving our enemies and accommodating them, we will cool down their anger and they will be more themselves. So long as we are dealing with an angry man, there is no way to reason with him because he is vindictive and can only think of his pain and is oblivious to the suffering of others. This too is the same advice of St Paul when in the same vein he advised, “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave room for the wrath of God; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’ So, if your enemies are hungry, feed them; if they are thirsty, give them something to drink; for by doing this you will heap burning coals on their heads. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Rom 12:19-21) Otherwise, we will become evil, angry, revengeful and resentful like our enemies as well! We will be no better than them. Revenge can only escalate to more retaliations and even killing.
Thus, we see that in two different situations, the rules are applied differently. With regard to our loved ones and friends, we must not destroy them by pandering to their selfish demands and expectations. In this case, we need to be loving, charitable and yet firm in love. On the other hand, with our enemies, we must give in to them for the sake of peace and, more importantly, to win them over to our side. Once we become their friends, then we can help them to grow in grace, forgiveness, generosity and charity. Indeed, all are called to love and show mercy but we must never do anything for short term gains, but do it for the overall good of the person and the community. Hence, love must be true and truth is expressed in love.
Written by The Most Rev William Goh, Roman Catholic Archbishop of Singapore © All Rights Reserved.
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