20200814 THE IMPOSSIBLE COMMANDS
14 August, 2020, Friday, 19th Week, Ordinary Time
Readings at Mass
Liturgical Colour: Red.
These are the readings for the feria
First reading |
Ezekiel 16:1-15,60,63 © |
I clothed you with my own splendour but you made yourself a prostitute
The word of the Lord was addressed to me as follows, ‘Son of man, confront Jerusalem with her filthy crimes. Say, “The Lord says this: By origin and birth you belong to the land of Canaan. Your father was an Amorite and your mother a Hittite. At birth, the very day you were born, there was no one to cut your navel-string, or wash you in cleansing water, or rub you with salt, or wrap you in napkins. No one leaned kindly over you to do anything like that for you. You were exposed in the open fields; you were as unloved as that on the day you were born.
‘“I saw you struggling in your blood as I was passing, and I said to you as you lay in your blood: Live, and grow like the grass of the fields. You developed, you grew, you reached marriageable age. Your breasts and your hair both grew, but you were quite naked. Then I saw you as I was passing. Your time had come, the time for love. I spread part of my cloak over you and covered your nakedness; I bound myself by oath, I made a covenant with you – it is the Lord who speaks – and you became mine. I bathed you in water, I washed the blood off you, I anointed you with oil. I gave you embroidered dresses, fine leather shoes, a linen headband and a cloak of silk. I loaded you with jewels, gave you bracelets for your wrists and a necklace for your throat. I gave you nose-ring and earrings; I put a beautiful diadem on your head. You were loaded with gold and silver, and dressed in fine linen and embroidered silks. Your food was the finest flour, honey and oil. You grew more and more beautiful; and you rose to be queen. The fame of your beauty spread through the nations, since it was perfect, because I had clothed you with my own splendour – it is the Lord who speaks.
‘“You have become infatuated with your own beauty; you have used your fame to make yourself a prostitute; you have offered your services to all comers. But I will remember the covenant that I made with you when you were a girl, and I will conclude a covenant with you that shall last for ever. And so remember and be covered with shame, and in your confusion be reduced to silence, when I have pardoned you for all that you have done – it is the Lord who speaks.”’
Responsorial Psalm | Isaiah 12 © |
The rejoicing of a redeemed people
Your anger has passed, O Lord, and you give me comfort.
Truly, God is my salvation,
I trust, I shall not fear.
For the Lord is my strength, my song,
he became my saviour.
With joy you will draw water
from the wells of salvation.
Your anger has passed, O Lord, and you give me comfort.
Give thanks to the Lord, give praise to his name!
Make his mighty deeds known to the peoples!
Declare the greatness of his name.
Your anger has passed, O Lord, and you give me comfort.
Sing a psalm to the Lord
for he has done glorious deeds;
make them known to all the earth!
People of Zion, sing and shout for joy,
for great in your midst is the Holy One of Israel.
Your anger has passed, O Lord, and you give me comfort.
Gospel Acclamation | Ps110:7,8 |
Alleluia, alleluia!
Your precepts, O Lord, are all of them sure;
they stand firm for ever and ever.
Alleluia!
Or: | cf.1Th2:13 |
Alleluia, alleluia!
Accept God’s message for what it really is:
God’s message, and not some human thinking.
Alleluia!
Gospel | Matthew 19:3-12 © |
Husband and wife are no longer two, but one body
Some Pharisees approached Jesus, and to test him they said, ‘Is it against the Law for a man to divorce his wife on any pretext whatever?’ He answered, ‘Have you not read that the creator from the beginning made them male and female and that he said: This is why a man must leave father and mother, and cling to his wife, and the two become one body? They are no longer two, therefore, but one body. So then, what God has united, man must not divide.’
They said to him, ‘Then why did Moses command that a writ of dismissal should be given in cases of divorce?’ ‘It was because you were so unteachable’ he said ‘that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but it was not like this from the beginning. Now I say this to you: the man who divorces his wife – I am not speaking of fornication – and marries another, is guilty of adultery.’
The disciples said to him, ‘If that is how things are between husband and wife, it is not advisable to marry.’ But he replied, ‘It is not everyone who can accept what I have said, but only those to whom it is granted. There are eunuchs born that way from their mother’s womb, there are eunuchs made so by men and there are eunuchs who have made themselves that way for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.’
THE IMPOSSIBLE COMMANDS
SCRIPTURE READINGS: [Ez 16:1-15.60.63 OR Ez 16:59-63; Is 12; Mt 19:3-12 ]
Today’s gospel reading takes us to something that is deeply personal because it affects our life and our happiness. This is with regard to the question of marriage, divorce and celibacy. These issues affect every one of us deeply and hence they are the most contentious as well. The world is divided on these issues. Even Christians do not agree as to what exactly is the Lord’s command with respect to these matters. These issues will never go away. In the history of humanity, these issues have plagued our ancestors as well. We cannot agree on the indissolubility of marriage; the definition of marriage as a union between a man and a woman; and celibacy for those who have a higher calling to serve God.
Knowing how controversial these issues are, we read how some of the Pharisees “approached Jesus, and to test him they said, ‘Is it against the Law for a man to divorce his wife on any pretext whatever?” They knew that whatever answer he gave would not please everyone. If He said, Moses was wrong, then He would be going against the Law of Moses. If He were to endorse the command of Moses, He would be going against the law of creation. This is true for all leaders today, whether religious, community, political or corporate. Whichever position we take is bound to elicit both approval and condemnation. That is why most leaders prefer to steer clear of such debates. They want to do the politically correct thing, lest they lose favour with the people. We dare not call a spade a spade, for fear of losing popularity and even our position in society.
How did Jesus deal with these controversial questions? Instead of making a statement whether Moses was right or not, Jesus traced the teaching on the indissolubility of marriage, a marriage between a man and a woman, based on natural law, and the divine intention. He answered, “Have you not read that the creator from the beginning made them male and female and that he said: This is why a man must leave father and mother, and cling to his wife, and the two become one body. So then, what God has united, man must not divide.” So the Lord invites us to reflect on the divine plan that God has for men and women. His divine plan for us is clear, that marriage is to be permanent until death because a man and a woman are called to be one body; and this is for the sake of procreation and the upbringing of children. This is implied when following this teaching on marriage, Jesus immediately brought the children to Him and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of heaven belongs.” (Mt 19:14) Only strong marriages can help to form our young children in the way of the Kingdom of God. A strong family is always the bedrock of society.
However, Jesus was also cognizant of the human reality, a fallen nature and a wounded humanity enmeshed in sin. God’s plan for humanity has never been fully realized even among those who are married and not divorced. Indeed, those who pride themselves for being faithful to Jesus’ command by not divorcing might not in actual fact be living the marriage covenant because they fail to love their spouse the way the Lord loves His church. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, in order to make her holy.” (Eph 5:25f) We are all very much aware, especially in today’s time when both husband and wife are working to meet the financial needs of the family, that there is less and less time for each other and their children. This often results in misunderstanding, distancing, miscommunication, alienation, loneliness, anger, suspicion and resentment. Truly, keeping a relationship, nurturing and strengthening it, requires commitment and sacrifices. Too often, after marriage, couples start to take each other for granted. They forget their love for each other, become absorbed in themselves, and are too proud to forgive each other.
This, precisely, was the same mistake of the Israelites in their relationship with the Lord, as Ezekiel so beautifully recounted in the first reading. Israel was nobody. She was unwanted and neglected. “No one leaned kindly over you to do anything like that for you. You were exposed in the open fields; you were as unloved as that on the day you were born.” But God in His mercy showered His love and care on her. She grew and became beautiful. From being loved by God, she was now able to respond in love. The relationship between God and Israel was like a marriage. Unfortunately, after some time, she took her position before God’s eyes and her beauty for granted. She forgot the graciousness of God. Instead of taking comfort and being grateful to God for His blessings, she became focused on herself, her beauty and her achievements. Worse of all, she sold herself to gain wealth and fame through prostitution. “You have become infatuated with your own beauty; you have used your fame to make yourself a prostitute.”
In the light of human weakness and sinfulness, the Lord commented on why “Moses command(ed) that a writ of dismissal should be given in cases of divorce.” “It was because you were so unteachable that Moses allowed you to divorce wives, but it was not like this from the beginning. Now I say this to you: the man who divorces his wife – I am not speaking of fornication – and marries another, is guilty of adultery.” Jesus was adamant that we cannot simply change the laws of nature, which is one man, one wife. This has been so and no civil or religious laws can change the order of creation. So the permission for divorce was rooted not in God’s plan but the attempt to accommodate man’s imperfect love for each other.
Hence, as Church, we need to maintain what the Lord has taught us. We cannot change the divine and natural law to fit our situation. This is why the Church continues to maintain the indissolubility of marriage and define marriage as between a man and a woman. The Church has no power or authority to amend the laws so clearly instituted by our Lord. However, this does not mean that we cannot be compassionate and merciful in the light of our human struggles and seeking to grow in perfection in the Lord. What cannot be compromised is the attempt by those who are divorced and those in same-sex union to seek to redefine marriage and make it a norm for society.
So whilst maintaining the position of the Church on marriage, we must also exercise great understanding and compassion for those who fail to live according to what the Lord asks of them. In truth, who does not want to have a beautiful marriage, a perpetual romance with our spouse? Who does not want to have a partner of the opposite sex so that they can have a child who is a true expression and fruit of their love for each other? Who does not need a partner in life to journey with him or her? Loneliness can kill a person and take the joy out of living. Everyone needs love and support. So we must not condemn those who are divorced and remarried, especially if they were trapped in a loveless marriage and are desperately seeking a happier life. We must not condemn those who in same-sex relationship as well, because they too need a partner in life. It is the same for those who took up the vow of celibacy but could not live it, much as they tried. We, too, must be sympathetic because it is natural to desire physical intimacy with someone we love. We are not saying that it is the right thing to do, but what we are saying is that this is the human reality, the sinfulness of humanity.
Nevertheless, we must never give up hope. The disciples remarked, “If that is how things are between husband and wife, it is not advisable to marry.” Jesus made it clear that it is a calling in life. “It is not everyone who can accept what I have said, but only those to whom it is granted. There are eunuchs born that way from their mother’s womb, there are eunuchs made so by men and there are eunuchs who have made themselves that way for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.” In the next pericope following Jesus’ appreciation of children, He said to the disciples, “For mortals it is impossible, but for God all things are possible.” (Mt 19:26) In the final analysis, whether we choose marriage, singlehood or celibacy, we depend on the grace of God. By responding to His love, we can love like Him in truth.
Written by The Most Rev William Goh, Roman Catholic Archbishop of Singapore © All Rights Reserved.
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