20161230 THE FAMILY AS EVANGELIZING AGENT
Readings at Mass
Liturgical
Colour: White.
First reading
|
Ecclesiasticus
3:3-7,14-17 ©
|
The Lord honours the
father in his children,
and
upholds the rights of a mother over her sons.
Whoever respects his
father is atoning for his sins,
he who
honours his mother is like someone amassing a fortune.
Whoever respects his
father will be happy with children of his own,
he shall
be heard on the day when he prays.
Long life comes to
him who honours his father,
he who
sets his mother at ease is showing obedience to the Lord.
My son, support your
father in his old age,
do not
grieve him during his life.
Even if his mind
should fail, show him sympathy,
do not
despise him in your health and strength;
for kindness to a
father shall not be forgotten
but will
serve as reparation for your sins.
Responsorial
Psalm
|
Psalm
127(128):1-5 ©
|
O blessed are
those who fear the Lord and walk in his ways!
O blessed are those
who fear the Lord
and walk
in his ways!
By the labour of your
hands you shall eat.
You will
be happy and prosper.
O blessed are
those who fear the Lord and walk in his ways!
Your wife will be
like a fruitful vine
in the
heart of your house;
your children like
shoots of the olive,
around
your table.
O blessed are
those who fear the Lord and walk in his ways!
Indeed thus shall be
blessed
the man
who fears the Lord.
May the Lord bless
you from Zion
all the
days of your life!
O blessed are
those who fear the Lord and walk in his ways!
Reading
2, Colossians 3:12-21
12 As
the chosen of God, then, the holy people whom he loves, you are to be clothed
in heartfelt compassion, in generosity and humility, gentleness and patience.
13 Bear
with one another; forgive each other if one of you has a complaint against
another. The Lord
has forgiven you; now you must do the same.
14 Over
all these clothes, put on love, the perfect bond.
15 And
may the peace of Christ
reign in your hearts, because it is for this that you were called together in
one body. Always be thankful.
16 Let
the Word of Christ, in all its richness, find a home with you. Teach each
other, and advise each other, in all wisdom. With gratitude in your hearts sing
psalms and hymns and
inspired songs to God;
17 and
whatever you say or do, let it be in the name of the Lord
Jesus, in thanksgiving to God
the Father through him.
18
Wives, be subject to your husbands, as you should in the Lord.
19
Husbands, love your wives and do not be sharp with them.
Gospel
Acclamation
|
Col3:15,16
|
Alleluia, alleluia!
May the peace of
Christ reign in your hearts;
let the message of
Christ find a home with you.
Alleluia!
Gospel
|
Matthew
2:13-15,19-23 ©
|
After the wise men
had left, the angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, ‘Get
up, take the child and his mother with you, and escape into Egypt, and stay
there until I tell you, because Herod intends to search for the child and do
away with him.’ So Joseph got up and, taking the child and his mother with him,
left that night for Egypt, where he stayed until Herod was dead. This was to
fulfil what the Lord had spoken through the prophet:
I called my son
out of Egypt.
After Herod’s death,
the angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt and said, ‘Get up,
take the child and his mother with you and go back to the land of Israel, for
those who wanted to kill the child are dead.’ So Joseph got up and, taking the
child and his mother with him, went back to the land of Israel. But when he
learnt that Archelaus had succeeded his father Herod as ruler of Judaea he was
afraid to go there, and being warned in a dream he left for the region of
Galilee. There he settled in a town called Nazareth. In this way the words
spoken through the prophets were to be fulfilled:
‘He
will be called a Nazarene.’
THE
FAMILY AS EVANGELIZING AGENT
SCRIPTURE
READINGS: [ECCL 3:2-6,12-14; PS 127:1-5; COL 3:12-21; MT 2:13-15,19-23 ]
Today, marriage and family
life is more than ever under threat, like the Holy Family in today’s gospel.
We read how they had to flee from King Herod who felt threatened by the
birth of the Messiah. They went to take refuge in Egypt, like many
refugees do today in times of war. Upon coming back, they had to stay in
Nazareth instead of going back to Judaea because King Archelaus, who succeeded
his father Herod as ruler of Judaea, was known to be a blood thirsty and evil
king. And it was at Nazareth that Jesus grew up under the tutelage of
Mary and Joseph. Like the Holy Family, today, our families face threats
from within and from without. Marriage and the family are under siege from
all fronts. Indeed, there is much confusion over one’s identity today
simply because we are not even clear of what is marriage or family.
What are the three major
challenges facing family life in Singapore? Firstly, we have an aging
population. We have a growing number of elderly persons. In a rapid
and fast moving economy and a country that is affluent, it becomes more and
more difficult to look after our elderly. Most of our people are working
full time and they cannot find time to look after their elderly, more so when
they are no longer mobile or are suffering from a loss of memory.
Young people who are absorbed in their career and in making money not only have
no time for their parents but often do not contribute to the expenses of the
household. Many are not assuming their responsibilities to care for the
elderly. In the light of such demands, we should not be surprised
that some quarters are calling for the use of euthanasia, so that the elderly
who are sick need not be a burden to society.
The first reading reminds
us of how important it is to look after our elderly at home and to give them a
dignified lifestyle. The book of Sirach teaches us that “the Lord honours
the father in his children, and upholds the rights of a mother over her sons.”
To honour our parents is something basic in life. It is the fourth
commandment that many have forgotten. Taking care of our elderly is an
essential aspect of family life. Those who do not look after their
elderly set a bad example for their children to follow; and they will do
likewise to their parents when they are old. But if we care for our
elderly, we will reap the fruits of love and compassion.
We need to exercise
patience and compassion for our elderly. Sirach says, “My son, support
your father in his old age, do not grieve him during his life. Even if his mind
should fail, show him sympathy, do not despise him in your health and strength;
for kindness to a father shall not be forgotten but will serve as reparation
for your sins.” We must also recognize that they are human
beings. Not only do they need physical and material support, they also
have emotional and spiritual needs. As caregivers, we must seek to
understand the psychology of the elderly so that we can feel with them,
understand them and give them the necessary assurance of love, comfort and
insecurity. For all the love and patience they extended to us when we
were young, we are called to accord the same patience, understanding and love
for them. We must not forget that one day we too will be like them.
The second challenge facing
our families is the relationship between husbands and wives. In seeking
for a higher quality of life, many married couples put their career first,
before their spouse and children. Many put their needs, enjoyment
and desires before their family. This weakens the marriage and
family bonds. In order to sustain their lifestyle, many opt to have one
or no children so that they can have greater freedom to go wherever they
like. Many just work to enjoy the pleasures of life; good food, nice
houses, big cars and luxurious holidays. The lack of communication and
the long absence from each other easily lead to a breakdown of intimacy.
As a result, many seek extra marital relationships to fill the vacuum in their
lives.
Marriage can be
strengthened only when there is a communion of love. There
can be unity only when wives are willing to cooperate with their husbands, but
husbands must first and foremost seek to put their wife’s interests before
theirs. But when husbands put their own interests and selfish needs before
their wife’s, it would be difficult to expect the wife to surrender her life to
him. Unless, husbands and wives make time for each other; regularly
sharing their lives with each other, their thoughts, their joys, woes and
struggles, they would not be able to feel with and for each other. Is
your spouse your confidante and your best friend? If not, certainly it is
a sign that your love for each other is diminishing.
The third challenge facing
the family concerns the raising children. It is ironical that many think
that children would be a source of unity in marriage. Some women think
that having children will keep the marriage together. This is not always
the case. More often than not, spouses disagree bitterly over how the
children should be raised. This can lead to personal differences, soured
relationships, anger, constant bickering, quarrels and resentment. Of
course, when couples are united in mind and heart, they will work and collaborate
to find the best way to bring up the children. Two heads are always
better than one, provided there is constant communion, dialogue and the
willingness to defer to each other in humility and charity.
St Paul warns parents not
to be overly ambitious and put too much pressure on their children.
Whilst children should be obedient to their parents always, “because that is
what will please the Lord”, St Paul in the same vein warns parents to “never
drive your children to resentment or you will make them feel frustrated.”
Our young people are under tremendous stress today. But instead of receiving
encouragement and support from their parents, some parents drive their children
to do more than they could. Children do not feel the unconditional love of
their parents. They think that their parents love them only when they do
well in their studies. As a consequence, they suffer from low self-esteem
and a sense of inadequacy. This leads to insecurity and jealousy,
especially if their siblings or friends are performing better than them.
There is also a fourth
challenge that we seldom take seriously. This is the social effects of
globalization and migration. With migration the family is no longer
cohesive. Conjugal bonds and family relationships are weakened because of
prolonged separation. Often, children grow up without one parent at home
to nurture them. Parents are reduced to mere financial providers.
Although the children might have a better quality of life, often they have no holistic
upbringing or guidance from their parents, many of whom are working
overseas. It is difficult and challenging to maintain a long distance
relationship. That is why a higher quality of living often leads to a
lower quality of family life.
If the situation has worsened
it is because the faith of our families is weak and not well
founded. We lack the spiritual foundation to ground our
families. Instead of abiding in the gospel values, the values advocated
are those from the world. We live in an age of consumerism.
In an age of mass communication, everyone is busy with their digital devices
and communication is no longer personal but through devices.
Individualism and materialism prevail in our society with negative impact on
family life.
Consequently, St Paul urges
us to build a home founded on the values of the gospel. “You are God’s chosen
race, his saints; he loves you and you should be clothed in sincere compassion,
in kindness and humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with one another;
forgive each other as soon as a quarrel begins. The Lord has forgiven you; now
you must do the same. Over all these clothes, to keep them together and
complete them, put on love. And may the peace of Christ reign in your hearts,
because it is for this that you were called together as parts of one body.
Always be thankful.” Unless our Catholics are formed in the gospel values
and grow in Christian virtues of compassion, forgiveness and humility, charity
and patience will be lacking.
It is critical that if we
want our families to be evangelizers for the family in the world and society,
we need to strengthen the intimacy of our married couples and the unity of the
family. Only then can we become truly an inspiring force in society. Let
us “never say or do anything except in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving
thanks to God the Father through him.” May our families be the
light of authentic love and unity in the world.
Written by The Most Rev William Goh Roman Catholic Archbishop of
Singapore © All Rights Reserved
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