Wednesday, 3 December 2014

20140814 FORGIVENESS CAN ONLY COME FROM THE HEART

20140814 FORGIVENESS CAN ONLY COME FROM THE HEART  


Reading 1, Ezekiel 12:1-12

1 The word of Yahweh was addressed to me as follows,
2 'Son of man, you are living among a tribe of rebels who have eyes and never see, they have ears and never hear, because they are a tribe of rebels.
3 So, son of man, pack an exile's bundle and set off for exile by daylight while they watch. You will leave your home and go somewhere else while they watch. Then perhaps they will see that they are a tribe of rebels.
4 You will pack your baggage like an exile's bundle, by daylight, while they watch, and leave like an exile in the evening, while they watch.
5 While they watch, make a hole in the wall, and go out through it.
6 While they watch, you will shoulder your pack and go out into the dark; you will cover your face so that you cannot see the ground, since I have made you an omen for the House of Israel.'
7 I did as I had been told. I packed my baggage like an exile's bundle, by daylight; and in the evening I made a hole through the wall with my hands; then I went out into the dark and shouldered my pack while they watched.
8 Next morning the word of Yahweh was addressed to me as follows,
9 'Son of man, did not the House of Israel, did not that tribe of rebels, ask you, "What are you doing?"
10 Say, "The Lord Yahweh says this: This prophecy concerns Jerusalem and the whole House of Israel who live there."
11 Say, "I am an omen for you; as I have done, so will be done to them; they will be deported into exile.
12 Their prince will shoulder his pack in the dark and go out through the wall; a hole will be made to let him out; he will cover his face, so that he cannot see the country.


Responsorial Psalm, Psalms 78:56-57, 58-59, 61-62

56 But still they challenged the Most High God and defied him, refusing to keep his decrees;
57 as perverse and treacherous as their ancestors, they gave way like a faulty bow,
58 provoking him with their high places, rousing his jealousy with their idols.
59 God listened and vented his wrath, he totally rejected Israel;
61 He abandoned his power to captivity, his splendour to the enemy's clutches;
62 he gave up his people to the sword, he vented his wrath on his own heritage.


Gospel, Matthew 18:21--19:1

21 Then Peter went up to him and said, 'Lord, how often must I forgive my brother if he wrongs me? As often as seven times?'
22 Jesus answered, 'Not seven, I tell you, but seventy-seven times.
23 'And so the kingdom of Heaven may be compared to a king who decided to settle his accounts with his servants.
24 When the reckoning began, they brought him a man who owed ten thousand talents;
25 he had no means of paying, so his master gave orders that he should be sold, together with his wife and children and all his possessions, to meet the debt.
26 At this, the servant threw himself down at his master's feet, with the words, "Be patient with me and I will pay the whole sum."
27 And the servant's master felt so sorry for him that he let him go and cancelled the debt.
28 Now as this servant went out, he happened to meet a fellow-servant who owed him one hundred denarii; and he seized him by the throat and began to throttle him, saying, "Pay what you owe me."
29 His fellow-servant fell at his feet and appealed to him, saying, "Be patient with me and I will pay you."
30 But the other would not agree; on the contrary, he had him thrown into prison till he should pay the debt.
31 His fellow-servants were deeply distressed when they saw what had happened, and they went to their master and reported the whole affair to him.
32 Then the master sent for the man and said to him, "You wicked servant, I cancelled all that debt of yours when you appealed to me.
33 Were you not bound, then, to have pity on your fellow-servant just as I had pity on you?"
34 And in his anger the master handed him over to the torturers till he should pay all his debt.
35 And that is how my heavenly Father will deal with you unless you each forgive your brother from your heart.'
1 Jesus had now finished what he wanted to say, and he left Galilee and came into the territory of Judaea on the far side of the Jordan.

FORGIVENESS CAN ONLY COME FROM THE HEART  
SCRIPTURE READINGS: EZ 12:1-12, 60, 63; MT 18:21-19:1
http://www.universalis.com/20140814/mass.htm
The gospel today touches on something which perhaps is one of the most difficult things in life that we are called to do: to forgive those who have hurt us.  Yet forgiveness is such a logical thing to do in life.  We all know very well that when we fail to forgive and be reconciled with those who hurt us, we cannot find real peace within ourselves.  We can pretend that we can live with our unforgiveness.  But we know that deep inside us, we are cheating ourselves.  In this sense, we can understand why Jesus says that the Heavenly Father cannot forgive us unless we forgive those who have hurt us.  This must not be understood as the Father withholding forgiveness from us; rather we withhold forgiveness to ourselves and to others.

Furthermore, the parable in today’s gospel makes it so clear that it is absolutely logical that we must forgive.  The fact is that we are all sinners.  We have hurt others as much or even more than others have hurt us.  And if we have been forgiven, how could we continue to resist forgiving others who have hurt us?  Yes, I’m sure that upon hearing the parable told by Jesus, we are also cut to the quick, like the fellow servants who were dismayed to discover that their fellow servant who has been forgiven by their master should treat his fellow servant without mercy and compassion.  Indeed, like them, in our minds, we say, “How can?”

Alas, the truth is that forgiveness is not a logical thing.  That is why when Peter asked Jesus how often he must forgive his brothers who have wronged him, the answer of Jesus was “not seven … but seventy-seven times.”  In other words, forgiveness is not a mathematical problem that we solve like some other logical problems in life.  Forgiveness is not simply a rational problem but it is a problem of the heart as well.  Consequently, Jesus in exhorting us to forgive says that we must forgive from our heart.

Indeed, this, perhaps, is where the real obstacle is:  finding the courage and strength to forgive those who have hurt us.  The problem is that we try to solve the problem too intellectually.  Man is not simply a rational being; he is also a feeling being.  In fact, it is feelings that control the happiness of a person much more than his thinking.  Consequently, in any misunderstanding or injury, the heart is wounded at its core.  Thus, even if we want to forgive we find ourselves incapable of forgiving, for the simple reason that our feelings remain hurt.  Hence, it is not so much why we should forgive but rather how we should forgive. No one wants to retain events that do not promote their happiness and peace. So how can we heal ourselves so that forgiveness can be effected easily?


Firstly, we must realize, not only intellectually but existentially that we are truly sinners.  It is not enough to verbally proclaim that we are sinners.  We all know that.   But do we really feel that we are great sinners?  The sad reality is that many of us while proclaiming ourselves to be sinners do not really feel that we are so.  Deep within ourselves, we do not really believe that we are sinners.  In fact, most of us think that we are saints.   Only because we think that we are saints and perfect, do we feel justified to judge and condemn others.  Indeed, if we really believe that we are sinners, would we have the moral authority to judge others?  Our rash judgment of others implies that we live impeccable lives. Hence, if we want to be compassionate, we must experience in the depths of our being, our sinful condition.  How can we do this?  By returning to our past, especially those moments when we have sinned terribly against God, ourselves or our fellow human beings.  Then, we did not have the dignity even to face people.  But because we have been forgiven, we could begin our lives anew.

The second stage in the process of forgiveness then follows.  Once we get in touch with our past and the experience of forgiveness, we will also be able to give this to those who have hurt us as well. As it is said, “Freely we have received, freely we give as well.”  By realizing our own mistakes in the past, we learn to identify ourselves with those who have hurt us.   Just as we needed time and space to grow, we too can give others space and time to grow.

Thirdly, we must realize that in the final analysis, forgiveness demands hospitality.  We must be generous enough to give room to others in their weaknesses.  It requires a magnanimous heart.  Instead of focusing on how we have been hurt by the other person, we must focus on how the person is also hurting himself in that process.  Of course such magnanimity presupposes that we have been forgiven before.  As Jesus told once said, “Those who have been forgiven much will also love much.”

It is unfortunate that most of us tend to forget that we have been forgiven. This is so ironical.  We remember for a long, long time and even for life, those who have hurt us.  But we have such short memories of people who have forgiven us and loved us in spite of our blunders in life.  Like Ezekiel who through a prophetic act reminded his people of their state, we too perhaps need to reflect on our past, those who have forgiven us and especially the forgiveness of God in the crucified Christ, so that our hearts can be touched and healed.  Only then can we have the strength to forgive from our hearts those who have hurt us.

If not, then we will behave exactly like the servant in today’s gospel.  We will destroy ourselves eventually because in passing harsh judgments on others who have failed us, we cannot but also prepare our own destruction.  Remember the the proverb which says, “those who live in glass houses must not throw stones.”  Precisely, because we all live in glass houses, let us realize, before we throw stones at others, that we cannot pretend to be faultless ourselves.

WRITTEN BY THE MOST REV WILLIAM GOH
ARCHBISHOP OF SINGAPORE
© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

No comments:

Post a Comment