20150915
SHARING THE SUFFERINGS OF OUR LOVED ONES IN SPIRIT
Readings at Mass
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First reading
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Hebrews 5 7-9 ©
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7
During his life
on earth, he offered up prayer
and entreaty, with loud cries and with tears, to the one who had the power to
save him from death, and, winning a hearing by his reverence,
8 he
learnt obedience, Son though he was, through his sufferings;
9 when
he had been perfected, he became for all who obey him the source of eternal
salvation
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Psalm
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Psalm
100:1-3,5,6 ©
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I will walk with
blameless heart.
My song is of mercy
and justice;
I sing to
you, O Lord.
I will walk in the
way of perfection.
O when,
Lord, will you come?
I will walk with
blameless heart.
I will walk with
blameless heart
within my
house;
I will not set before
my eyes
whatever
is base.
I will walk with
blameless heart.
The man who slanders
his neighbour in secret
I will
bring to silence.
The man of proud
looks and haughty heart
I will
never endure.
I will walk with
blameless heart.
I look to the
faithful in the land
that they
may dwell with me.
He who walks in the
way of perfection
shall be
my friend.
I will walk with
blameless heart.
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Gospel
Acclamation
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cf.2Tim1:10
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Alleluia, alleluia!
Our Saviour Jesus
Christ abolished death
and he has proclaimed
life through the Good News.
Alleluia!
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Or
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Lk7:16
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Alleluia, alleluia!
A great prophet has
appeared among us;
God has visited his
people.
Alleluia!
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Gospel
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Luke 2:33-35 ©
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As
the child’s father and mother stood there wondering at the things that were
being said about him, Simeon blessed them and said to Mary his mother, ‘You see
this child: he is destined for the fall and for the rising of many in Israel,
destined to be a sign that is rejected – and a sword will pierce your own
soul too – so that the secret thoughts of many may be laid bare.’
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SHARING THE SUFFERINGS OF OUR LOVED ONES IN SPIRIT
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SCRIPTURE
READINGS: Hebrews 5:7-9;
Luke 2:33-35
How
often do we feel helpless in helping people, especially when they are
suffering? Not only are we unable to help them financially or physically,
but even emotionally. Indeed, we are often lost for words to encourage
them. We do not know what to say to comfort them. We look at them
and we feel so helpless and useless. There is nothing we can do to
relieve the suffering. We use means in our power to help but to no avail.
We can only watch them suffer in pain and in depression. We feel
frustrated and even angry with God, besides being angry with ourselves.
In such a situation, what do we do?
Like
Mary, we are called to simply stand by the cross of Jesus. In celebrating
the feast of Our Lady of Sorrows, we feel with Mary who stood by Jesus not just
when He was rejected in His ministry and even thought to be mad by His
relatives. She had always stood by Him in good and in bad
times. Although alone and widowed, she did not prevent Jesus from
leaving home for the work of His Father. Mary was supportive of Jesus’
mission from beginning to the end.
But we
have no sufferings that can be compared with Mary’s sufferings. No one
can and will ever be able to suffer the way Mary suffered with Jesus. She
was His mother. He was her only son, her flesh and blood. She was
one in mind and heart with her Son. At the wedding in Cana, she was one
with the will of God and invited us to do the same, “Do whatever He tells
you.” When presented with a problem she did not once exert the
obligations of filial piety on Jesus to solve it. She just informed the Son
that “they had no wine” without instructing Him what to do. She knew her
Son better and trusted in His wisdom and judgement. (cf Jn 2)
Hence,
when we reflect on the death of Jesus on the Cross, it must be said, that
although Mary did not suffer in body like Jesus, she suffered in spirit.
She was a martyr in spirit. St Bernard wrote, “Who are you and what is
the source of your wisdom that you are more surprised at the compassion of Mary
than at the passion of Mary’s Son? For if he could die in body, could she not
die with him in spirit? He died in body through a love greater than anyone had
known. She died in spirit through a love unlike any other since his.” She
suffered not so much in her body but she suffered as much as what Jesus
suffered on the cross morally. Jesus suffered because of our sins, which
He carried in His body. Not only did He carry our sins but He was also
condemned for our sins. Like the Suffering Servant, He was crushed for our
sins.
What
went through the heart of Mary when she saw her Son carrying the cross through
the streets of Jerusalem on His way to Mount Calvary? We cannot imagine
how much she would have suffered, seeing her Son bathed in blood, scourged
beyond recognition, losing so much blood and with raw and open wounds, carrying
the cross and being paraded as a criminal. Yet, Mary stood bravely with
Jesus and moved with the crowd as she watched helplessly her Son struggling all
alone with the weight of the cross and enduring the ignominy of being ridiculed
and shamed by the people and mocked by the soldiers. Yet, Mary did not
utter a word against God or against His enemies. In sorrow and in
pain she shared with Jesus His sufferings in her heart. She must have
been such a strong woman to carry such pain in her heart. Her grief
cannot be compared to ours even when we lose our own loved ones.
Most of
all, when she was at the foot of the cross, she had to endure the last filial
act of our Lord on the Cross when He gave His disciple to Mary, “Behold your
son!” And to the beloved disciple, “Behold your mother!” (Cf Jn 19:26f) On the
surface, Jesus was doing a filial act by entrusting the care of His mother to
one of His disciples, since Jesus was her only son. But how can the Son
of God be replaced by the son of man; or a master by a disciple? There is
no substitute for Jesus. This is true for us when we love someone dearly
and deeply. Can anyone replace our spouse, our boyfriend or girlfriend or
even our dog?
Mary
fulfilled the prophecy of Simeon who said that a sword will pierce her heart.
“As the father and mother of Jesus stood wondering at the things that were
being said about him, Simeon blessed them and said to Mary his mother, ‘You see
this child: he is destined for the fall and for the rising of many in Israel,
destined to be a sign that is rejected – and a sword will pierce your own soul
too – so that the secret thoughts of many may be laid bare.’” (Lk 2:33-35) So deep
is the wound and so sharp is the sword that no one can ever feel the way she
felt. After the death of Jesus, He no longer felt the pain in His body or
in His soul, but her soul suffered the violence of sorrow. For this
reason, the Church gave her the title, Our Lady of Seven Sorrows. Beyond
the prophecy of Simeon, she suffered when she had to flee for their lives to
Egypt. She suffered the loss of the child Jesus in the Temple. She
was filled with sorrow when she met Jesus on the way to Calvary.
Certainly, she must have been so overwhelmed at the way Jesus died on the
cross. As if it was not enough to see Him crucified, Mary had to see her
Son pierced on the side by a soldier’s lance. This last action would have
pierced her heart even more. Finally, all that was left for Mary was to
receive the lifeless bloody body of Jesus in her arms and leave Him in the
tomb. Such were the seven sorrows of Mary.
Yet in
all these events, she was not angry with God or vindictive of the enemies of
her Son. She stood by the cross in silence and joined her sufferings with
that of her Son, forgiving those who killed Him. There was no anger but
only grief for her enemies because of their ignorance. She was so full of
love that she could love beyond herself and her own pain of seeing her Son
suffering. Like her Son on the cross, she would have uttered the same
words of Jesus in her heart, “Father, forgive them for they knew not what they
were doing.” Like Jesus, Mary not only forgave her enemies but she prayed
for them and made excuses for their actions, reducing them to ignorance.
Such was the magnanimity of Mary. How many of us pray for our enemies
with love and compassion, much less to make excuses for them for hurting us and
making us suffer?
In the
light of this feast of our Lady of Sorrows, we too are called to suffer in
spirit with those who are suffering, especially when they suffer innocently and
unjustly. Our blessed Mother is asking us to suffer in silence and in
love for them, whether they are our friends or our enemies. If we feel
helpless like her for her Son, let us offer that inadequacy in helping our loved
ones with Mary to Jesus. With those who are the cause of our suffering, we must
remember what St Peter wrote, “Do not repay evil for evil or abuse for abuse;
but, on the contrary, repay with a blessing. It is for this that you were
called – that you might inherit a blessing.” (1 Pt 3:9) And again,
he wrote, “For it is better to suffer for doing good, if suffering should be
God’s will, than to suffer for doing evil. For Christ also suffered for
sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, in order to bring
you to God.” (1 Pt 3:17f)
Indeed,
following the example of Jesus in our weakness, we need to surrender everything
to the Lord in faith and trust and in obedience. If we surrender
ourselves to Him in total obedience to His divine will and wisdom, the Lord
will hear us and He will transform us. This is all that is needed of
us. We cannot take things into our own hands. We need to allow God
to be God. Just as He did the impossible by raising Jesus from the dead,
He will do the same for us. We only need to pray in faith. We
are called to stand by the cross like Mary. We feel with them and for
them. Remaining helpless, we need to believe in the power and wisdom of
God that He will act in His own time.
So let
us obey Jesus and give a place to Mary in our home, in our spiritual
life. Like the beloved disciple, let us bring Mary to our home.
This means that we are called to accept Mary as our spiritual mother. She
is the mother of the Church represented by the unnamed disciple of the
Lord. We are called to learn from her to share the sufferings in spirit
of those whom we cannot help in body. We may not be able to take
away the sufferings of the other person but we can always pray for them and
offer them the hope of Christ. Let us in faith take the assurance of
Jesus to heart, “Because I live, you also will live.” (Jn 14:19)
Written
by The Most Rev William Goh
Roman
Catholic Archbishop of Singapore
© All Rights Reserved
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